Funny MMA Quotes

“I will beat you into a living death” – Ken Shamrock

“I will knock your hair black” – Ken Shamrock to Ortiz

“90 percent of the game is half mental” – Tim Sylvia

“Im the oldest I’ve ever been, right now” – Tim Sylvia

“you will be the last of the mohicans” – Tito to Chuck

“he took a book from…chucks chapter” – Goldberg on Tito

“the lil eagle soars again!” – Goldberg on Jens “lil evil” pulver

“I only want to be known as the best ever. Is that too much to ask?” – BJ Penn

“I’m a very unique fighter. If there were two of me I’d be unnecessary.” – Sam Morgan

“I don’t train, I meditate”- Olaf Alfonso

“I fight with the power of jesus in my corner!”- Joe Son

“Rip Rules”- Greg “Ranger” Stott

“I’m going to knock Steroni out” – Frank Shamrock

“I do a lot of jacking off, ya know, because I don’t get no women, so these arms are, like, humongously big. See it’s workout, and it’s pleasure.._” Charles Bennett

“I dont believe in an eye for an eye, I believe in two eyes for an eye” – Bas Rutten

“It went well, thank you. Bas Rutten is the most handsome man in the world….”, Bas pretending to translate a Japanese fighter

“Now hopefully if he plays his card right. . .his cards, hopefully he has more than one.” – Bas Rutten on Wanderlei/Hunt

“Somebodys telling me that about my wife; Im sorry sir im going to have to break your leg.” – Bas Rutten

’’apparently the the only way to kill a lion is by rear naked choke…personally i’d just kick it in the head.’’ – Bas Rutten

“Look sir I really dont want anything of this, and I go ‘woosh’ like dis and I slit you throat and its over and out..” – Bas Rutten

“I am impervious to all pain!” – Pat Smith, UFC 1, right before tapping out to a Shamrock heel hook.

“Omigawa’s moving forward like a Karate robot.” -Joe Rogan

“and while the troops are fighting overseas for our freedom, I’m here in this cage fighting for the freedom of mixed martial arts.” – Tito

“I knew i ‘urt ‘im, when he said aarg” – GSP

“I want to fuck…..fight chuck” – Wanderlei

“I run a multi billion dollar company” – Tito Ortiz

“He broke tim sylvia’s arm…...So what?” – Brock Lesnar

“That microphon is melting right now” – Rampage commentating during Wand’s post fight speech

“That little fucker hit me with a Hadukan or something” – Nick Diaz on Gomi

“I’ve been watching alot of DVD’s” – James Thompson when asked about his training

“you got kicked with a kick” -Ken Shamrock

"Anderson Silva's striking is like a ballet of violence" - Joe Rogan

"Travis Lutter is the Michael Jordan of BJJ" - Mike Goldberg

“His precision is ah… really Precise.”
Mike Goldberg – UFC Fight Night, Silva vs. Irvin

"This isn't survior you don't vote people off, you beat them off"
Dana White – TUF, Team Nog v. Team Mir

"frank mir had a horseshoe up his ass, i pulled sum'bitch out and hit him over the head with it" - brock lesnar

"He tried to kiss me! Like a homosexual! I'm not gay" - Heath Herring

"I fight because I can't sing, I can't dance, and it beats working all day. Now ask me a question that doesn't sound so fucking stupid."- phil baroni

"My diet is atkins just with the carbs"-BJ Penn

"To to death, Georges" - BJ Penn